ic inbox

[credere]

 [ voice | video | text | spam ]

Comments

[credere]

Credence shuts the door behind him.

"...not very much sounds crazy to me," he points out softly. Or at least, when it does, it's things like same-sex adoption and Instagram.

[magician_king]

He leads him back and towards the kitchen- Brakebills is gone, his cabin is back to New York. Familiar architecture from both their old homes. The same construction material scattered around the empty rooms, the floor. The same chilly, hollow feeling.

"Tea?"

This seems like a teatime conversation.

[credere]

Credence glances around as he follows, not sure what if anything he should make of the change.

"Yes, please."

It feels safest not to ask.

[magician_king]

He starts the kettle going, and gestures at the kitchen table, for him to take a seat.

"So- entering super-secret friendship don't-tell-a-soul mode?"

[credere]

Credence nods as he sits down.

"Um, I - can't really think of a time I've ever not been in....that mode. But, okay."

[magician_king]

"Good point."

But, curling up on the chair opposite.

"Jedao is doing something I don't understand and it's had some unexpected consequences and he can't talk to me about it, and I'm going crazy."

[credere]

"What kind of - "

No, start from the beginning.

"What's he been doing?"

[magician_king]

"I don't know if I'm okay to say."

This feels like Steve all over again.

"Some semi magic soul searching?"

Is as close as feels fair.

"I can see how it'd mean seismic internal shifts, but he just hasn't come back. To me. Specifically. He's still living with Fives, as far as I know, but maybe he's more dependable?"

[credere]

The anxiety the comes with any discussion of Quentin's unorthodox love life springs to the fore. Credence consciously pushes it back.

"And he - won't tell you why?"

[magician_king]

"I haven't asked. He said he'd get back in touch when he was ready. Which was a couple of days before the port. Then he just left me a hedgehog- which is a good sign, right? I mean they're prickly but it's kind of an inside joke."

Hand scrubbing over his eyes.

"Maybe it's an olive branch? I can't go over there, can I?"

[credere]

"I..."

Credence chews his bottom lip for a moment.

"I guess you could? I mean, if he wants you to go away he can just tell you that, right...?"

[magician_king]

"I don't think so. A request for space is a request for space, and even nudging that boundary can feel like a bomb detonating."

He admits, and gets back up to go pour that heated water.

[credere]

Credence has never in his life asked someone for space and therefore struggles to consider things like that.

"Have you talked to Fives?"

[magician_king]

"Yeah. He, uh. He got in touch with me during the port and asked me to track Jedao down? He didn't know there was anything wrong."

He says, and oh good, now he can't breathe.

"I said I couldn't do it, and he said so much for being family, so. I really might be broken up with? You take sugar, right?"

[credere]

"I - yes, thank you - did you tell him that Jedao didn't want you talking to him?"

[magician_king]

"Yeah."

He admits, and comes over, face burning now.

"But I guess from his perspective him being safe in the moment is more important than what I feel about how boundaries should be."

[credere]

Credence thinks about this. Tries to imagine what he'd do in Quentin's position, in Fives'.

"Did he think Jedao might be in danger?"

[magician_king]

"I guess he must have."

He puts the teacup down, and rubs his hands over his face, and then excuses himself to go find a tissue. His nose is getting stuck.

[credere]

Credence frowns at the table.

"Why couldn't he go look for him? If he was that worried."

[magician_king]

"He did. He found him too. And it sounds like I was wrong about it and he actually was in trouble?"

Blowing his nose, quickly, before coming back to join him at the table.

"I mean. I thought he was just hiding from everyone."

[credere]

"....I think you should talk to him. I mean. If he'll give you a hedgehog he doesn't even know you want, but he won't talk to you, then he's not being a very good - boyfriend."

Credence frowns.

"What you want, how you...feel. That's important too."

Part 'several' of 'infinite' statements he could stand to internalise.

[magician_king]

"But don't you think everyone deserves someone who can just be the damage sink once in a while?"

He says, and sips his tea.

"He's down. I'm going to be up until he can find his feet once more. It'd be just- I want to be in the kind of relationship where we're there for one another when we're in need, and I'm pretty sure he's the one right now who needs most."

[credere]

Credence just looks completely bewildered.

"But....I don't understand. You're not being there for him. You're avoiding him. Are those the same thing?"

[magician_king]

"If what he needs is to be avoided, even though I just want to go to him- isn't it?"

He says, looking just as baffled.

"He's allowed to want what he wants."

[credere]

"I don't know. If - if I said I needed some time alone and then disappeared for more than a week and got hurt, I'd want Shiro to see if I was okay," is all he can offer.