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[credere]

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[poetontheinside]

Yeah, I never asked you about that-- what was the beef between the two of you?

[credere]

I used to be afraid of him and he thought I hated him.

[poetontheinside]

But now you know you could kick his ass and he knows you, uh, don't hate him?

[credere]

He knows.

...It was different when I was first here. I didn't have much of my magic, and most wardens intimidated me. [By way of explanation:] After I talked back to my second warden during a flood, I went to see her with my belt in my hand. I thought that was how it was going to be.

[poetontheinside]

[He can't help but visibly make a face at that-- he's glad that Credence hadn't been like that when he first became Ray's inmate. He knows why, of course. Credence's fucking mother.]

I guess I can see how a big guy like him could scare you.

[credere]

It wasn't about size. Rey was tiny, but I still...

They were wardens. I wasn't. They had all the power and I didn't have any, and I wasn't used to that.

[poetontheinside]

You were kinda used to not having any power, though. All that time-- I mean. Before you used what you had inside of you.

What did she do?

[credere]

She hugged me.

[It was. A character-building moment.]

[poetontheinside]

[Oh. Ray has never met the woman, but he feels a sharp stab of pride and gratitude at that. That she just knew so well what to do in that moment.]

She sounds like a good warden. A good person.

[credere]

She-

She was.

[His voice is small and tight.]

I miss her.

[poetontheinside]

[Now he does wish he was there with him. To put an arm around his shoulder, at the very least. Instead, all he can do is slide down the kitchen cabinets so he can sit as he looks into the camera.]

Yeah. A person like that, it sounds like she'd be hard to let go of.

[credere]

[He drags in a breath.]

I had to. Nobody's ever come back.

[poetontheinside]

[He nods in understanding.]

Right. Your other warden, too, right? Jesse?

[credere]

Jesse.

Alec's still here, but he stopped being my warden.

[poetontheinside]

What's he like with you?

[credere]

Fine, I guess. We don't really talk much anymore.

[poetontheinside]

Well, that sucks. You talk much when he was your warden?

[credere]

Yes, we did. He was - he was good.

[poetontheinside]

He seems like a pretty organized guy. Calm.

[credere]

He is. He was. I...wasn't always, back then.

[poetontheinside]

Yeah? You mean like trashing your room when you got angry?

[credere]

Trashing my room, trashing other rooms, killing people sometimes.

[/shrug]

[poetontheinside]

Right. You told me about that when I first got here.

[credere]

He was good about it. He wouldn't send me to Zero, he just wanted to talk.

[poetontheinside]

Anyone ever give him shit for that, you think? [He doesn't think he'd ever send Credence to Zero-- what good would it do? But he wonders what the other wardens used to think.]