It sounds like you do, if you think you aren't going to get common decency. And you think people don't care enough about you to do any of the stuff you said.
Protecting isn't just about physical protection. Sometimes, it's about making sure people don't get beat up metaphorically too. Sometimes, it just helps to know someone wants to, even if you don't need it.
Everyone deserves to know someone's looking out for them, I think.
So if someone made you angry... does it matter if they were trying to make you angry or is it just something you'd do at anyone or anything making you angry?
[ He blinks at that, then takes a moment and rubs at his temple before trying to address that.]
Credence, when I said I didn't care, what I was addressing was the fact that I don't know you. We don't have any personal significance to each other. We can't, not yet.
[ His hand gestures mildly to Credence. ]
But to me, something like this, something like the things I mentioned earlier... that all falls under how you care about every single person you meet, whether you've built something yet or not.
So I suppose the way you think of things, yes, I do care. But that caring is built on what I believe, not anything particular to you. What I was trying to say was just that I won't pretend that you matter more to me just because you were assigned to me.
[ He has a few guesses, obviously, but he doesn't want to assume. If there's one thing he knows from practically living in the minds of all manner of awful people, it's that things like this can come from all sorts of places and trying to understand it requires an open mind.]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-12-01 09:18 pm (UTC)Protecting isn't just about physical protection. Sometimes, it's about making sure people don't get beat up metaphorically too. Sometimes, it just helps to know someone wants to, even if you don't need it.
Everyone deserves to know someone's looking out for them, I think.
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:19 pm (UTC)Not everyone.
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:25 pm (UTC)In my experience, those people are like that because they've never had someone really looking out for them.
[ He does feel the need to be truly honest, though.]
Which doesn't mean I like them or agree with them or excuse them for what they've done. Doesn't even mean I won't punch them out myself.
But I try to keep it in mind.
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:31 pm (UTC)I have people who'll...look out for me.
If anybody makes me angry I usually just kill them.
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:35 pm (UTC)And I guess that's a thing to do? Kinda limited, though. [ he scratches an ear ] And it seems like it wouldn't really solve much around here.
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:37 pm (UTC)They stop bothering me. So it's fine.
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:38 pm (UTC)What's 'bothering you' look like, if you don't mind me asking?
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:49 pm (UTC)I don't know. People - make me angry for different reasons.
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Date: 2018-12-01 09:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-12-01 09:59 pm (UTC)Why do you care?
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Date: 2018-12-01 10:02 pm (UTC)[ And the question isn't a flippant reversal. He can't understand the idea of not trying to understand.]
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Date: 2018-12-02 11:30 am (UTC)Because you don't care. You said.
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Date: 2018-12-02 01:58 pm (UTC)Credence, when I said I didn't care, what I was addressing was the fact that I don't know you. We don't have any personal significance to each other. We can't, not yet.
[ His hand gestures mildly to Credence. ]
But to me, something like this, something like the things I mentioned earlier... that all falls under how you care about every single person you meet, whether you've built something yet or not.
So I suppose the way you think of things, yes, I do care. But that caring is built on what I believe, not anything particular to you. What I was trying to say was just that I won't pretend that you matter more to me just because you were assigned to me.
But you do matter. I do care.
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Date: 2018-12-02 02:52 pm (UTC)...This is what I don't want to do any more.
This same conversation. Every month.
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Date: 2018-12-02 02:55 pm (UTC)[ He has a few guesses, obviously, but he doesn't want to assume. If there's one thing he knows from practically living in the minds of all manner of awful people, it's that things like this can come from all sorts of places and trying to understand it requires an open mind.]
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Date: 2018-12-02 03:03 pm (UTC)Because they don't!
[There's a crackling sound, like bad static.]
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Date: 2018-12-02 03:08 pm (UTC)I can't speak for anyone else, but I know that I do. I do right now, and I will continue to. Nothing you can do will change that.
So where does that leave us?
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Date: 2018-12-02 03:10 pm (UTC)Nowhere.
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Date: 2018-12-02 03:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-12-02 03:12 pm (UTC)Yes.
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Date: 2018-12-02 03:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-12-02 03:20 pm (UTC)Stop talking to me.
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Date: 2018-12-02 03:25 pm (UTC)[ He looks into the camera. ]
Just so we're clear, you could have put down the communicator at any time. But I would like to know: are you planning on killing me?
Just curious.
[ He doesn't actually look concerned. But he does realize one other thing.]
And you never actually answered my question.
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Date: 2018-12-02 03:29 pm (UTC)Why did you ask if you're sure you know the answer? Why did you even talk to me at all if you don't care what I have to say?
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